I just don't know what to do with myself

it's my birthday, 21st.

got extremely sad last night, 10 o'clock, already in bed. no moon or stars whatsoever.

cellphones were within reach, but there was no one to call.

she's with another man(they literally live together now...), he's too sick to talk with(and i don't really think i would want to call him...)

felt the burn in my face, it was not enough, not enough to wake me up...

don't really know how the night passed. but i woke up in the morning anyway.

cuz it's my birthday.

I just don't know what to do with myself...

maybe i do, but maybe i don't.